The way a human being truly understands things is really mysterious. People have the ability to read write and talk about something without truly understanding it. I'll use the term "feel". And sometimes, you need something unusual. Something unorthodox. Like three hits on the head. I can't say that it was an easy way. But I can say that it shred the cowwebs in my mind. And it made me see what I was repeating to myself like a mantra. "let go".
Having understood isn't always a happy thing either. But it's always better in the end.
This summer I might get my fucking inspiration back. Stay put.